Because I'm just that classy

Due to unforseen ridiculousness at the airport last night (and/or an airline employee's illiteracy) I found myself re-routed. The original plan was to take off from Kansas City, Missouri (I actually went to Topeka, KS on a business trip - very disappointing on some levels, didn't see cornfields, a bison - their state animal - or a tornado; but very satisfying on another, I got a burger, applesauce, pepsi with cherry flavoring, a coffee and a homemade piece of coconut cream merangue pie for $6) and land at BWI via Chicago. Instead I went via Dallas/Ft.Worth. I had to throw away my Auntie Anne's lemonade before I got on the plane, even though I clearly demonstrated it was not liquid nitrate by taking a few sips and not dying. I was very confused as to which group I was supposed to board with because instead of 1, 2, 3 etc, my ticket said "First". So I waited until they were letting all groups on just to avoid conflict at the gate ("Sorry ma'am, "First" must have been a typo, you're in group 6"). I walk by First Class to find my seat - 2E. I get to coach and start looking. It starts at row 8. Holy CRAP! I think I'm sitting in First Class, hence the "First" listed after group. Of course, at this point I have to back track against the 20 other people behind me trying to fight their way to coach. I finally get settled and realized what an ass I've looked like until this point. I have my back pack with all sorts of flair, my hair is a flat mess, and I'm wearing a "Property of Levenworth" T-shirt that I had bought at the airport because I was cold. No worries though, I didn't care how I looked after the waitress brought me out a pre-flight Jack and Coke while we were still putzing at the gate. I don't think we had quite taken off when I fell asleep in the nicely, proportionately designed chair. The thing in first class is that nobody bothers you. There weren't any crying babies, they let you watch tv (even on the short flights) and you don't have to wrestle with a midget for a blanket. Hot damn, I think I could get used to this.